Description

Welcome to the pump palace. The DildosRUs Hoodie is for the brave, the bold, and the blockchain degenerates who know a green candle when they see one. Soft as a bear market. Thick as your favorite chart. Whether you're trading in your mom's basement or moonwalking in Miami, this hoodie says what your portfolio’s been screaming:

"I go up, and I don't pull out."

• 100% Comfy AF cotton blend
• Front pouch for snacks or stashed coins
• Double-stitched for maximum endurance
• Not financial advice, but probably a good buy

Wear it loud. Trade it proud. DildosRUs.

Pros and cons

• Peak meme energy
• Might get you laid
• Excellent gift for your wrecked friends
• Might accidentally start a cult.